Day 4… not gone so well :/

13 Jul

Hi all

Welcome to my daily update.

Well, today has been a failure I’m afraid. I woke up with all good intentions. Didn’t crave my usual biscuit breakfast and was all set to go home for lunch as I have been for some ham sandwiches on wholemeal bread. So allll healthy and ready to tackle another day of eating well.

That was, until my colleague called me up and offered to take both myself and other colleague/friend for lunch. Here I was thinking ‘OK, I’ll just have grilled chicken at Nandos’, but Nandos was too busy and we only had an hour,  so instead we headed for Chimmychangas. I knew as soon as I was stepping into the restaurant I would be eating the most fattening and delicious foods, and I didn’t disappoint my brain… but I did upset my waistline.

I had the most delicious steak fajitas with chips and a few nacho’s. And I mean DELICIOUS. But sadly, I am now feeling annoyed with myself for agreeing to go for this lunch. I should have had the will power to say no. It’s just typical of me to agree. But, I love that place, and hell,  it was a free lunch… who would say no?!

The only thing I will say is, I’m not going to let this ruin me. Ok so I’ve messed up today, but does this mean I have to let it mess me up for good and give in already thinking ‘well I might as well carry on eating rubbish all day now’… NO! I’ve let that happen to me far too many times where I will have a bad day, it puts me off and then I just give up on myself and go back to my old ways of eating junk. Why do I do that to myself? Everyone is bound to have off days with anything they are trying to give up, a smoker will still have a sneaky fag every now and then when they are giving up and this is no different.

But I’m getting back on that wagon and riding it again. I won’t let one slip up ruin how determined I’ve been this week. In fact, it’s made me even more so as I feel I can fight this.

I WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT! Not for anyone else but me. I want it for health and fitness reasons, and I want it for physical aesthetics too. I want to be able to go into a clothes shop and pick up whatever I like the look of, it fit and be happy again. Not go in, it fits over my head and then I need assistance as I can’t get it off. Yes this happened to me. I was so embarrassed.

I remember a couple of months ago also, a top that I bought when I was a comfortable size 10 -12, no longer fitted. I think since I’ve gained weight, my breasts have gotten slightly bigger as, when trying on this top recently, I pulled it down with all my might past my boobs – realised I could hardly breathe and thought to take it of. Only, I couldn’t. After about 5 mins of struggling and going red in the face from panic and actual pain (as it was stuck on my arms and cutting into them) I had to run downstairs with my gut hanging out and a top half way up my chest and get my mum to help take it off. It took several minutes and I actually wanted to cry!

I’ve gained more weight since then!!!

That’s why I can’t let one slip up destroy my need to get rid of this excess weight and actually be able to wear something by just slipping it on.

The test now though is the weekend. I know I am going out with my mum this Sunday for lunch. But I also know it is at a restaurant where I can quite happily eat grilled chicken and a baked potato so I don’t have to over do it.

So that’s my entry for today. Unfortunately an unsuccessful day, but a different mindset to that I used to have.

Until tomorrow…. Happy Friday the 13th 🙂

Athena xXx

2 Responses to “Day 4… not gone so well :/”

  1. Marie Midtlid July 16, 2012 at 10:32 am #

    You go girl, it’s never too late! And if the food was delicious (it sounds like it) and you really enjoyed it – don’t feel guilty 🙂 Just eat healthier the next day!

    • athyd July 17, 2012 at 11:38 am #

      Thanks 😀 I’m back on track now. Eating a lot healthier again. I must write my blog for the past 3 days 😮 been busy. Thanks for commenting 🙂 x

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